Facing my Vice

Total Word Count (est): 12K; Daily Word Count: 0

     Spent the day at Capricon, which is surprisingly not my vice and so unrelated to the title of this particular post.  Yet here I am, about to tell you all even more unrelated info about my vice, yet it is relevant for those who are following this in hopes to one day themselves become a successful writer.

     I was in the audience for the panel on 'Writing Is a Business' that was Moderated by (the awesome) Tim Akers and with panelists (who are also awesome): Matt Forbeck, Gene Wolfe and Richard Chwedyk.  I asked several questions and was both motivated and inspired to continue my writing (as you can see above, my total word count is a little over twelve thousand words) as a business and career.

     This is the part where my vice comes into play.  Gaming.  Larping or table-top.  It's the thing that I have been doing for years and is my true addiction.  Recently I discovered it, like other more caustic addictions, impacted my personal life in a very negative manner.  I tried to cut back.  I then tried to quit.  Neither worked.  So, with the help of my very supportive spouse, I delved into what I was getting out of it that I needed.  Turns out it wasn't gaming at all, but a sense of belonging to a group.  Simply (though things are never this simple) put, my ego needed affirmation that my contribution was accepted and praised within the social demographic of like-minded individuals.  Ok, that was a lot more flowery than I intended and a bit of a contradiction in terms, but it works.

     In any case, this is the first day of me actually facing my vice and not "trying" to face it.  This is the first day of my life as a writer.  The empowerment I felt today as I shook the hands of those who will one day soon be my peers both reminded me of and solidified for me my goal.  One day I want to be sitting at that table, moderating a panel about writing sitting next to those folk who I asked questions of today.  One day I want to be where they are and giving out the advice they gave me, to you.  That's my stated goal and you're reading the first step I am taking on it.

Thanks for being a part of it.

~Stephan